Still, the dogs are barking at me. I can hear them from a far distance. When I reached home after my purchase, the bag of rice rice tore and collapsed at my doorstep. I know it's saying something but I don't know what. I feel a great change in me. But still I feel the fear/tension when I spent each penny( it has reduced but still it's there). My inner configuration is changing, I'm becoming vulnerable as a baby along with a lot of sadness and fear.

I went outside to buy an article for me to remember my commitment in my journey and my connection with twin flame. I was attracted to a glass lotus, but I didn't buy it, I didn't even ask the price , because I thought it would be priced more then what I have. I don't know why I did that? I could have atleast ask the price? Once again im confirming to universe that I can't have things. When I tune inwards I don't see I'm lacking anything. Something is happening when I go out. I couldn't find anything and ended up buying grocery and sweets. I nneed to work with this ssituations.

Where am I? What's my current state? During the first two days of the retreat, I felt like a muddy water, no light, no clarity. Now I could atleast see, that im in the middle of a high voltage streaming twinflame consciousness and a potential karmic pastlife. A stage of processing and integrating. I'm seeing the numbers 44 and 88 all around, pointing the karmic construct which appearing externally my struggles with resources. When I contemplate at a wider level, the meeting of high vibrational avalonian energies and the old karmic construct of Earth leading to massive changes reflecting as Volcamic eruptions and earthquakes. Is Avalonia a closest reflection of Gaia's Twinflame? The physicality of earth is changing. YES, the games are changing.

At an individual perspective, the small I in me is afraid. Afraid of how it's gonna be in it's relationship with others. That's a big thing. But it's know there is no going back. Because everything is changing internally

I made a small altar at one corner of our bedroom. It felt really good. Its a small symbol of my commitment. I need a few more things to keep my crystals and Ganesha, it will come to me soon.

Feeling Grateful to be a part of this grand shift.🙏

NB:I have edited this post a couple of times because the way I see things are changing. A Change from victimisation to self empowerment.

Thank you

Soumya