Hi.

Recently gathered enough strengt to get out of my 6 year old relationship. A lot has changed, i have withdrawn inwardly for myself bymyself. I have my own appartment, and don´t spend as much time with people as i used to. I always needed people around me, due to heavy childhood trauma. Now in this moment i find myself scared, afraid. Of what i don´t know... i try to lean into my body, feeling it and being catapulted into the mind most of the time.. I reckon the fear, and uncomfortableness by being alone stems from way back and is rooted deep inside. My rational mind knows i am not in danger, but as the evening grows dark and the night approaches here in Norway the fear intensifies. My screaming ego or the voice in the head is constantly looking for someone to talk to, speak to.. keep me distracted from the dreadful lonesome feeling in my self..

I have done lots of work and traveled a long and brutal way already through inner child and shadow work. But is there something i am missing here? I go into silence expecting it to disappear somehow. I see now that there is nothing to get rid of, it is there but by welcoming it, accepting it and not deeming it. Can make this chapter a little bit easier, being softer and gentler with myself with where i am at. And all i have done.

Thank you! The answer came by itself as i was writing