This ties in to my inquiry that is currently strongest in my life and presenting a number of conundrums. As it stands now by july or maybe august I will have to go back into the matrix fulltime or become homeless. I knew this question would become relevant (but the year went by so fast) Now that the moment is here in honesty I must admit it is not going to be homelessness. I can put this to many things, like not having the strength to trust the flow now that my resources are almost gone or not seeing a new way forward or not having spend enough time or commitment building connection with the soul. But no matter what, this is how it is.

I have achieved much in lifestyle, unraveling and integrating but there is still a lot to do and it does not seem to matter that in my feeling and conviction I honestly knew in my heart a new way forward would present itself. Nothing has, at least not in a way that can sustain my life. It is therefor difficult to believe that I have been living according to my soul, because then where is that support? There was the knowing that at least something would be highlighted, something would become clear about a way of life that would have any meaning in support of good. At the very least some small way that would allow me to invest some of my time and gain some resources in return, i.e not requiring fulltime matrix re-entry.

It has not so apparently I am still too invested in the matrix then? I have been too caught up in distractions over the past year? What does it say about my intuition when I cannot find the trust in myself anymore? Just go back to some meaningless job like warehouse worker or whatnot, five days per week and accept that I should consciously liberate from there? I cannot see how that would even work.