Lovely Anastasia, <3 <3

Thank you for your sharing, very touching, as well as the video - took me back to the land of the past, in territories where pain and pleasure interweaved!

I am currently and for some time now been experiencing major and VERY interesting kundalini movements on all levels - multidimensionally - so apologies for my delayed response. xx Listening to the body-mind-spirit conversing requires space and care as you clearly feel yourself and as you shared on another thread. Today I had a Tui Na massage and everything feels intensified! A 'good thing' ;) x

Watching AMA, the first thing that popped into my mind was the feeling of what she is experiencing and how it must feel! I felt stillness, quietitude, a sense of presence, lightness and grace expressed through her body in water. The closer I could relate to this feeling in water is scuba diving! What totally amazed me was how expressive the body can be in challenging conditions. If one fights with the physical or neglects its key messages as an apnea practitioner, or as a diver (well as anyone!) this dance would be impossible. I feel that there is a harmonious upgrading here of capacities that are mobilised by a tuning into the Source.

And yes! I totally agree with you about how we harshly condition our bodies (at the gym, sports etc) and the seeking of perfection through this engagement! And the internalisation of all the distorted social messages about beauty, perfection, body and form magnifies this seeking and feeds it - kinda like being in a vicious circle.

I have witnessed and have experienced being the seeker of perfection of body, perfection of mind and even perfection of spirit. I find that the self in all its manifestations can be a project that seeks perfection! When I used to do a lot of sports and gym work, I wanted excellence of body. When I used to be an academic, I wanted excellence of mind. When I used to meditate 11 hours per day I wanted excellence of 'my spirit'. And then you hit the wall!! That sth that 'interrupts the routine'. The inner truth. And for me it interrupts it because it asks me to 'see more clearly', to feel into the filters because although there is the distortion, there is also the truth. Can I uncover the truth and love myself and give space WITH the distortions, so as to re-discover the truth of my Being?

Now I go to the gym and meditate. Feel my body, feel awareness, feel any filters as they arise. I listen to the harshness if it arises and I ask it: 'tell me'...'who is this?' And feeling. Its an exploration. I know my body wants to move and feels a sense of freedom, responsiveness, aliveness, vibrancy, energy when it moves, in any way. Dance happens everywhere :)

What was very touching Anastasia is that you mentioned Beauty and Pain coexisting in your experience, or at least thats how I read it here:

I’m being shown something about myself through this amazing video. I seem to believe that if I don’t have the perfect dancer’s attributes, (which I will never have again, for natural reasons) -then I can’t dance.

It also translates as ‘if I don’t look or express a certain way, then I can’t be loved.’

I feel the pain clearly now, but I also feel the emerging beauty of my dancer’s soul spiralling through and around it gathering momentum...

In response, I dedicate this song/video to YOU - you are such an inspiring dancing soul!! Love you x