Theos kai Panagia, Aspasia!

That was one of the most penetrating and touching things I’ve ever seen and read. So poignant. An arrow straight for my heart, revealing so much pain and beauty interwoven into one another. The divine paradox of something being so exquisitely beautiful it hurts.

My lower mind wants to ask, how does she do that? But my higher mind doesn’t care.

It makes me think of how harshly we condition our bodies. Each in our own way. As a dancer more so than others. Always striving to perfect the form, according to preprogrammed ideals, but constantly failing for such a form doesn’t exist. I remember a dancer I was acquainted with. She was an absolutely beautiful dancer but noticeably ‘overweight’. And she was struggling to find work because of it. I always questioned why it had to be that way, but I still continued to obey by the rules and judged myself harshly for every extra pound that I allowed to surface.

I realise now as I type this that one thing that pains me so much about watching this woman in water, is how beautiful and perfect her body is. The way I always aspired and worked hard for mine to be. Always at the gym building muscle, burning fat, making sure everything stayed in place, panicking if any piece of me began to ‘transgress’ the boundaries.

Two years ago, however, something strange happened. I couldn’t continue this way. Something always interrupted my training routine, and although I formerly always managed to overcome such ‘interferences’ with discipline and an iron will, this time it was impossible! My soul simply refused. Wild horses couldn’t drag me to the gym, despite my egos desperate pleas as I was watching my precious, hard earned ‘form’ falling apart. My soul literally said ‘I will not set foot in that place again until you do it for the right reasons!’.

I’m being shown something about myself through this amazing video. I seem to believe that if I don’t have the perfect dancer’s attributes, (which I will never have again, for natural reasons) -then I can’t dance.

It also translates as ‘if I don’t look or express a certain way, then I can’t be loved.’

I feel the pain clearly now, but I also feel the emerging beauty of my dancer’s soul spiralling through and around it gathering momentum...

I cannot thank you enough for this thread. I really am dancing again, inside and out.

This one is especially for you, Aspasia, 😉 (but all are welcome to it of course)

❤️

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=-TW39_BjPKA