Hi Michele,

I've been wondering about these beings. Since I was eight, terrestrial felines have been a huge source of comfort and reciprocal expressions of love and affection when i had no humans to have that with. I came across an article somewhere now forgotten, about the Urmah, the galactic feline race. Sitting with the third eye recently I saw a tiger but don't know what it was saying. I would be interested in knowing how it felt to be in their presence.

I relate to your pain very much. Sometimes the ugliness of this world is incomprehensible and feels like it's tearing me apart from the inside. My habit is to beat myself up for 'failing' because I can't get beyond it, but lately have been reminding myself it's all part of the dance of one step forward and three steps back. I had a dream recently where I was wrapped in this beautiful energy of self-love and complete self-acceptance that helped me be beyond my typical low energy reactions to other's ugliness, and embodying this energy, I wasn't brought down by nastiness like I typically do. It held me aloft. And even though I haven't been able to get back to that feeling-state, I know it is the key to navigating the ugly bits. And a reminder that the ugly bits aren't me. Oh what I would do to reach and stay in that state! Completely accepting and forgiving myself would feel like heaven.

Thanks for that particular quote because it speaks to just where I'm at: Maximum inconvenience and impossible situations, although it could be worse. But instead of taking it all so personally and feeling as if I deserve it like I always have, I'm really starting to embrace it as the opportunity to get inward and find that self-love and inner peace that will help me handle the storms better. Maybe even finally relax and enjoy the ride, storms notwithstanding. And that it's okay if I don't get it right away. I'm 53, I can't expect 50 odd years of shit to just magically unravel overnight. It's just hard to remind my impatient self of that. Fall a hundred times, get back up a hundred and one. Part of a song I heard in a movie the other day really stood out for me:

Hey child things are looking down

That's okay you don't need to win anyway

Don't be afraid just eat up all the grey, and it will fade away

Don't let yourself fall down

And one of my favourites by Meister Eckhart:

The only part of you that burns in hell is the part that won't let go of your life: The memories, the attachments.

They burn them all away. But they're not punishing you, they're freeing your soul.

If you're frightened of dying and you're holding on, you'll see devils tearing your life away.

If you've made your peace, then the devils are really angels, freeing you from the earth.

Hope this helps.

Best wishes,

Barb