As I carry the name of the Magdalen, and I have honoured her as a Guide, rarely present to me, yet always a Loving frequency as well as one very much based in a grounded way of Being, bringing insights when needed that simplify an issue I haven't found a way to deal with - this has been my experience of her.

Now, participating in the Resurrection retreat, the archetype of her as a wounded, shallow, lacking in emotional intimacy in sexual healing in Egyptian times, has been hard to be with.

So what is it in me, that has these characteristics, that I could not deal with? that is my enquiry...and I returned into a past process soon after my activation into Spiritual life, when I spent many times wailing out my grief and betrayal. It was all pervasive...her time in front of Jesus on the cross, having to hold his energy and taking on some of his suffering, is what I felt this to be from. It was angry, feeling betrayed, and lost in the overwhelming emotion, added to by that of Mary as well - they had to leave at one point, unable to take it any longer. That is my recollection of this time from her, as it was given to me.

Going through my chakras, the solar plexus very affected - loss of empowerment, unable to deal with it all, plus betrayal. Heart - angry that all of this emotion is still being focused on by Humanity, when she has moved beyond it now...echoes of connection to Gaia, also now in a higher space and Healed, yet, stuff still going on in the lower frequencies that keeps reactivating these old wounds. So the question comes, am I still holding onto this too? Do I see myself as wounded, betrayed, angry? I have. Am I still? There are times when I feel overwhelm and helpless, my go to, to let me know its time to regroup and go inward.

Throat's turn...strong sense that its time to let go of all the drama of the crucifixion, and focus on the resurrection. What have we learned from it? I feel the courage of Jesus in choosing this path; to stand so strongly outside the matrix. Yet, there is also fear, that such suffering needs to be emulated to attain an ascended state - why? It doesn't. There are always many paths to the same goal, even as, personal healing is vip and integral to them all.

Jesus laid down a template, to show us that he was able to follow a path that held him outside the matrix, throwing off the restrictions that were imposed on him by it, by being the expression of his Soul, in Open's words. The Divine Masculine - courageous, committed to his path, holding the space of moving forwards in integrity, in my words, in his unconditional Love.

His counterpart, his wife, his teacher as he was hers too - the Divine Feminine of the Magdalen - giving her all to support his process, while staying in her own power, her own presence of Love, that did not demand he change or she change, in total acceptance of his path...at least, until the suffering overwhelmed her in that moment.

Can we recognise, the gift of this period, as a profound time of moving beyond the wounds of suffering, of betrayal, of helplessness or overwhelm etc, or of the vengeful wounded feminine in all the underhand ways ascribed to it, and be in instead, the beauty of the empowerment shown by both, lived by both, to cause ripples and tears in the matrix, that allow us now, to focus on how best to keep this growing and expanding in us and thus in the matrix too. To focus on the gifts of total unconditional Love and acceptance, unity consciousness, of standing tall in the face of at times severe opposition, which doesn't mean fighting it in the usual sense, but being a stance for it being irrelevant, no longer needed, as the Soul perspective is of acceptance, of learning, of being a moving force for new opportunities arising within us all from the learnings already gained.

What is keeping us from this? that is what we need to answer for ourselves, as I do, too.